


Happy Miserable Infatuated

by idrilhadhafang



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Alternate Universe - Writing & Publishing, Anal Sex, College Student Poe Dameron, First Time Blow Jobs, Flirting, Kylo Ren in Love, M/M, Masturbation, Minor Jessika Pava/Paige Tico, Mutual Masturbation, Phone Sex, Riding, Rock Star Kylo Ren, Shower Sex, Stephen King References, Writer Poe Dameron
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-27
Updated: 2019-06-03
Packaged: 2020-03-20 06:07:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18986803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang
Summary: It had been Finn, ultimately, who had gotten Poe out of the house to see the band known as the Knights of Ren. “It’s not like you’re doing anything. I’m not doing anything either,” Finn said. “It’ll be fun!”In which Kylo is a rock star, and Poe goes to one of his shows — and ends up falling for him.





	1. The Knights of Ren

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MidgardianNerd](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidgardianNerd/gifts).



> Disclaimer: I own nothing. 
> 
> Author’s Notes: For MidgardianNerd, who has a cold. Feel better soon!

It had been Finn, ultimately, who had gotten Poe out of the house to see the band known as the Knights of Ren. “It’s not like you’re doing anything. I’m not doing anything either,” Finn said. “It’ll be fun!”

Poe supposed. He hadn’t necessarily heard the Knights of Ren in concert before, but he wasn’t averse, necessarily, to trying new things. Even as they drove over towards the site where the concert was, Poe took the time to Google the Knights of Ren band. 

“Kylo, huh?” Poe said. “What kind of a name is Kylo anyway?”

A shrug from Finn. “Well, it is his stage name. No idea where it comes from.”

”Kylo Ren,” Poe said, carefully considering each syllable. He pulled up a picture of the lead singer, who was admittedly not bad-looking. No, actually he was quite striking, come to think of it. This was when he was twenty-one, that was a year ago. (Poe was twenty-five, meanwhile. Kylo was twenty-two now and so far, his quirky little band had become pretty well-acclaimed.) Poe couldn’t help but stare, taking in the man singing into the microphone, how wild his black hair looked and yet so pretty...

”I swear you’ve never been more quiet,” Finn said, deadpan. 

“What? Oh, yeah,” Poe said. “Just...he’s very...handsome, isn’t he?” 

“Let me guess,” Finn teased, “You’ve fallen under his spell already.”

Poe snorted. “I just said he was handsome.” No, he couldn’t help but think, beautiful. But as much as he appreciated Finn as his friend, there were some things that were incriminating to say out loud. 

“Not a bad set of pipes either,” Finn said. “You could, y’know, hear some of what he’s got on our way there.”

”Why not?” Poe said. “Might as well know what I’m in for...”

It was even as Poe put in his headphones and searched on YouTube for the Knights of Ren’s songs — thank God for LTE, he couldn’t help but think — that he tsked a bit. “Well...they’re not exactly a barrel of laughs, are they?”

Finn snorted like he was trying to contain his laughter. “Poe, I swear, you are so bad...”

Finally, Poe found a song. More specifically, one of their more recent ones — if by recent, one meant 2018. Even as Poe clicked on the YouTube video for the song — more specifically, a song called “You Need A Teacher” — he couldn’t help but realize that Kylo Ren’s voice was...beautiful. Deep and flowing and resonant, almost seductive in nature as he sang about giving into one’s deepest desires. 

And Poe couldn’t help but listen, enthralled all the while. Letting this man’s sink in fully. This man...well, he definitely had some pipes on him, Poe would say that much. 

By the time the song was over, they had already pulled up to where the concert was going to be, and Finn turned to Poe. “You okay?”

”He’s...” God, but that song had gotten under his skin somehow. In a good way. “He’s good. Really.”

Finn grinned. “I say that’s a good start.”

They headed out of Finn’s car and towards the junction, and Poe couldn’t help but notice how, truly, packed it really was. He had to push through the crowd of people, nearly losing Finn in the process. People who had gathered to watch the Knights of Ren perform. Poe would definitely say that they seemed pretty excited. Couldn’t say he blamed them, actually. 

It was then that they finally found spaces in the crowd, and there was silence for a while before the band came up on stage. There was the bassist, an almost statuesque blond woman, the drummer, a rather skinny redhead, the guitarist, a skinny, short dark-haired man who looked almost timid, and finally, Kylo himself. The way he was lit, the way that the light all but haloed around his hair...he was practically beautiful. 

And he just had to open his mouth to thank the crowd for coming out tonight, just had to start talking with a speaking voice that was just as pretty to listen to as his —

Poe stopped. Was he smitten already? He couldn’t help but wonder. 

Finn winked at him, and Poe nodded gratefully. 

Then the drummer tapped out his beat, the guitarist and bassist started to play, and Kylo began to sing. 

Throughout the show, he sang with so much passionate energy that Poe couldn’t help but watch him even as his hair became wild (but not too much), as he moved about onstage with the sort of grace of a dancer. Song after song...it was amazing he didn’t blow out his vocal chords or something of that nature. 

It was after the show had ended that Finn persuaded him to go to the afterparty. Poe, still captivated from what he’d seen, nodded. Security let them in with a warning not to cause any trouble, and Poe obliged. He wasn’t the type to do that, anyway. 

Poe honestly didn’t know what to expect even as he headed into the next room. The first thing he noticed was that it looked incredibly normal, incredibly laidback. Almost like any other space where people could relax. Kylo Ren was there, and without the mad, passionate energy there onstage, he looked almost tired. Poe couldn’t help but feel a pang of empathy for him. 

“Hi,” Poe said. 

Kylo opened his eyes — very brown eyes, Poe couldn’t help but notice. Pretty eyes. Poe spoke. “Hope we’re not bothering you.”

”Not really,” Kylo said. There was something about his eyes where he seemed to be taking Poe in like he was...fascinating somehow. “Can’t say I’ve seen you around before.”

“It was my first time coming here,” Poe said. “My friend...dragged me along.” He made sure to smile at Finn even as he spoke, just to show it really was a good-natured quip. 

Luckily, even as a smile rugged at Kylo’s lips, Finn didn’t seem to mind. 

“You’re really good,” Poe said. “I’m impressed.”

”Thank you.” God, Kylo’s voice...it was so pretty. And he just looked so humble. Genuinely so, not like he was putting on a show or anything like that. 

Poe felt that first, tentative tug of fascination. 

They got autographed memorabilia, of course, and talked a while before leaving. And Poe...

Was happy-miserable a word? That was a good question. Either way, Poe knew it was definitely his mood right now even as he walked away. He had fallen hard over a voice, and Poe didn’t know that he wanted to stop falling. 


	2. Whatever That Feeling Is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe returns, and his dynamic with Kylo changes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.
> 
> Author’s Notes: Sorry this chapter’s so short!

A week passed. Poe’s time at the university was the usual business, only he’d found that he had started using the Knights of Ren’s music to help him study for his exams and do his homework. Something about the high energy guitar was enough to really get him focused, feel like he could do this, even in the classes that he could do without.

Naturally, he and Finn went back to the concert. It was a weekend, and Finn had dragged him out of the house with the rather persuasive argument that “all work and no play makes Poe a dull fan”, which had admittedly been pretty good. Pretty funny too. Poe made a note to himself to find a way to think of something similarly snappy.

It was at the concert that they played some familiar songs, but one that Poe couldn’t help but notice was new. “Who Talks First”. All about the matter of being awkwardly in love.

Even trying to think of who the lucky person in question was was enough to make Poe more than a little bit jealous. 

But then again, he thought, Kylo could fall in love with whoever he wanted, right? What was his business as to who Kylo —

Finn winked at him, and Poe smiled. It was a quiet reassurance, and Poe found he liked it. It was enough for him to regain his composure. What he had was mostly a man-crush. Nothing more to it...

It was long after the concert ended that Poe was about to leave when he ran into — not literally, but even so — Kylo Ren, who looked pretty exhausted from the concert. Poe stumbled back, feeling suddenly a bit abashed. “Sorry about that,” he said.

”No harm done,” Kylo said after a while. Then, “You’re the one who came by last time. I never got your name.”

”Poe,” Poe said. “Poe Dameron.”

”Poe,” Kylo said, almost reflectively, and even the sound of his name on Kylo’s lips was all but magic. “Interesting name.”

”Your name’s Kylo,” Poe said, and he almost regretted saying it. Almost.

A smile tugged at Kylo’s lips. “That’s a stage name. There’s a difference. It’s not a bad name you’ve got. I’ll say that much. Poe.”

God, but the sound of Kylo saying his name shouldn’t have made him weak at the knees. 

“Thank you.” Poe said.

”It’s the truth,” Kylo said. “Listen...it was wonderful talking to you last time. Maybe we could...talk sometime? I’d like to get to know you.”

Poe could have sworn that his heart literally skipped a beat. Then, “I like it. I like you.”

”The feeling’s mutual,” Kylo said. “I’ll see you around.”

He left, and Finn stared at him like he couldn’t believe what he saw. “Did the lead singer of the Knights of Ren literally — ”

”Yeah.” Poe smiled. Somehow, he could get used to it. “Not what I expected, but I like it.”

”You are literally so lucky I don’t understand why you just say you ‘like it’.”

”It could be fun.”

Finn groaned. “Your understatement is showing, Poe.”

Poe shrugged. “I prefer keeping my mind open. That’s all.”

They headed out, and on the inside, Poe could have sworn that he couldn’t be more excited. 


	3. Getting To Know You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe and Kylo have some quality time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Even getting ready for their...was it a date, Poe had to wonder. Kylo had told him that they were going to meet at the Starbucks down the street. Had even agreed to drive them there, and there was something about that little fact that was enough to make Poe’s heart flutter even more. 

Poe searched through his closet even as his small orange dog, BB, wagged his tail expectantly, almost like he was wondering if his owner would really just get it over with. Poe sighed. “Look, BB, I just...I don’t want to show up to my date looking like a complete disaster area...”

He paused. Did he really just call it a date? It sounded so presumptuous to think that. 

Finally, he found a shirt in a decent-ish shade of orange. That could work. The pants too, which were a darker shade. 

It was then that Poe took some time to look over his ensemble. It didn’t look bad, he would say that much. Had a look about it, the sort of look that suggested you were just getting coffee with someone. 

The doorbell rang, and BB practically went nuts, racing downstairs in that moment towards the front door. Poe opened the door and restrained BB just in time for Kylo to enter. 

He looked...great, Poe thought, looking at him in his all-black ensemble, his black jeans and black shirt. There was something about just seeing him in it that was enough to make Poe’s heart start, suddenly, hammering.

”You look nice,” Kylo rumbled. 

“Thank you. Sorry about BB; you know how he gets really excited around new people...”

”No need to apologize.” Kylo, tentatively, reached out if only to stroke the top of BB’s head. BB accepted, even if he was practically pawing at Kylo now. 

Poe smiled. “Think he kinda likes you.”

”That’s good. Ready to go?”

”Yeah.” Poe turned to BB and smiled. “You be good, BB. Chase some squirrels off our lawn if you can.”

Kylo chuckled. Poe decided he liked it, even as he closed the door and locked it. 

They headed towards Starbucks in that moment in Kylo’s car — a pretty impressive sleek get-up that Poe couldn’t help but admire. “This thing really moves,” he said. 

“You like it? I call it Silencer.”

Poe smiled. “I think I like it.”

Luckily for them, the Starbucks wasn’t particularly packed. Thank goodness for that. Poe doubted he needed people asking questions about why he was with a relatively famous rock star. They met with Maz Kanata, who was the cashier; she was a pretty, striking middle-aged African American woman who seemed to be familiar with Kylo.

Even as they took their drinks and sat down, Poe couldn’t help but wonder, really, to quote the song that Kylo played at his last concert...well, who talked first, really? 

“So,” Poe said, lightly, “Who asks who about their life first?”

He swore he saw a smile tugging at Kylo’s lips. He couldn’t quite read Kylo’s eyes behind the shades he was wearing, but he could imagine them all but sparkling. 

“I think I’ll go first,” Kylo said. “Tell me about yourself, Poe Dameron.”

”Well,” Poe said, taking a sip of his coffee, “I’m in college. Studying for a degree.”

”What kind?” Kylo said. 

“General studies,” Poe said. “Thinking of transferring and making it more...specialized. English, to be more specific.”

Kylo smiled. “Writer’s type, huh? I like it.”

”You could say that. It’s not like being a rock star, but...” Poe shrugged. “I’ve always loved science fiction.”

”I think you could do a lot better than some of the garbage we’ve got nowadays,” Kylo said. “I mean, stuff like _Gone Girl_?” He actually looked pained, and Poe felt his lips tugging to suppress a smile. 

“My friend Jess once threw that book across the room when she read the ending.” Poe said. 

“I like her,” Kylo said. 

This time, Poe really did laugh, and Kylo actually smiled, almost like he found Poe’s laughter genuinely endearing. Kylo then said, “So, what kind of science fiction do you like?”

They talked, and somehow, talking with Kylo felt like the most natural thing in the world. Eventually they had to go, but they still talked in the car. Poe told him a bit about his work-in-progress, and Kylo, shades off now, nodded as he focused on the road. Poe almost wished Kylo didn’t have to focus on the road so he could actually observe Kylo. The way he smiled, the way his eyes lit up. 

Finally, they reached Poe’s house. It was even as Kylo dropped Poe off on his doorstep that Poe turned to look at him, suddenly feeling vulnerable in that moment. Vulnerable and a little fluttery. Poe didn’t know how to feel about it, actually.

 “I had a great time,” he said. “Kylo...maybe I could see you again sometime?”

”You could always text me,” Kylo said. 

Poe’s eyes widened. “People are going to — ”

“Forget other people. I like you, Poe. I don’t think I’ve really had this much fun in a while.”

“Well...I do my best.”

Kylo’s thumb brushed over Poe’s comparatively smaller, golden-bronze hand. “I say you succeed.”

Poe’s breathing hitched and He swore his pulse quickened. Their hands brushing even as Poe handed Kylo his phone to program his number into it didn’t help. Kylo handed it back, and their hands brushed again, and God...

”I’ll see you again,” Kylo said. “You know where to find me.”

Poe nodded. Long after Kylo had left and he walked through the door to a very enthusiastic BB, he still felt dazed. He didn’t know what it was going on between him and Kylo, but he wouldn’t object to having more of it. 

 


	4. Burn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kylo and Poe flirt a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

There was something about Poe that was enough to follow Kylo into the next day. Thinking about his laugh, about his smile, the way he spoke about his work-in-progress and plenty more...it was enough to make Kylo, simply, want more of him. 

It was one time when they were discussing ideas for their next album (which they were still tossing titles around. Their first album had been self-titled and Kylo preferred not to go the Weezer route where there were a whole bunch of different self-titled album) that Hux sighed in exasperation. “You really aren’t hearing a single word I said, are you, Kylo?”

”Oh. Sorry.” Kylo cleared his throat. “We could always try a concept album. Something more science fiction-y.”

”Is science fiction-y even a word, Kylo?”

”Why not?” Kylo shrugged as he spoke. “The English language changes every day.”

”More like mutating into a horrible Cthulhu-esque abomination...”

”I don’t think that’s how Lovecraft works.”

It was Hux’s turn to shrug. “Whatever you say. I haven’t read Lovecraft since college.”

”Anyway,” Phasma said, pointedly, “Kylo has a point. That could very well work. As long as you don’t try covering ‘Perfect Situation’ again.”

”Cross my heart,” Kylo said. 

***

”You lucky bastard!”

Jessika Pava was the first one to bring it up, although her girlfriend, Paige, also seemed pretty flabbergasted. 

“Thanks,” Poe said. 

“Seriously, the fact you went out to coffee with a rock star...I can’t believe it!” Jess said. “What’s he like?”

”Well, he’s hella gorgeous. Charming. Funny. And he doesn’t let fame go to his head, y’know?"

”Sounds like a keeper,” Paige said. “Seriously, to think you were just going to be the hermit writer stereotype...”

”Ha ha,” Poe said sarcastically. 

Finn spoke up. “I say Poe’s pretty chatty for a hermit.”

Poe groaned mock-embarrassedly. 

“So, are you going to ask him for another date?” Jess said. 

“It’s not really a date,” Poe said. “I mean...we’re just friends.”

Would he object if it turned into a date, though? That was the question. 

***

Saying Poe was exhausted was an understatement. He had worked extensively on his homework, as well as his manuscript. Somehow, it felt like the words had been yanked out of him. When Kylo texted him, he sighed. At least he’d get to talk, instead of just type and type and type. 

Well, he was still typing, but still...

 _How are you?_  

Poe hesitated before replying. _Never better._  

 _Sarcasm_? 

 _Yeah. I’m tired._  

Silence. Then, _I’m sorry about that. I’m tired too._

 _Sorry_. 

 _It’s fine_. A beat. _You know, I’ve been thinking a lot about you. About our talk. You’re very charming. And beautiful._  

Poe could have sworn his heart skipped a beat. Then, _Really_? 

He’d had appreciative comments given about his looks before, but something about Kylo saying it was enough to make him feel shy — in a good way. 

_Yes. Completely. You’re captivating, and I want to know more about you._

_How much more?_

_A lot._

Poe paused. Then, _Where do I start_? 

_Well, tell me anything. Not too much though; I may get sucked in by your charm. 😉_

Poe’s breathing hitched, and he almost wanted to laugh in surprise. Then, _Are you flirting with me?_

_You’re a very charming, attractive, intelligent man. How you don’t have more admirers is...baffling._

_I’ve always been wrapped up in my work._

_Beautiful and mysterious. It’s like you came out of a romance novel. Only you’re not a brooding douchebag._

This time, Poe really did laugh, startling BB in that moment. He took a while to recover. 

_And you’re funny. You also really know how to flatter people._

_It’s not flattery if it’s the truth._

Poe _..._ well, God willing, he felt flattered. And bold. 

 _You’re gorgeous too_. 

A beat. Then, _I was never blessed with good genes._

 _You’re beautiful._ Now Poe wondered who had been cruel enough to call someone as gorgeous as Kylo ugly. 

Silence. Then, _Thank you_. 

Poe typed again. _You’re captivating too. As you put it. When you were performing on stage..._

He paused _._ How could he even begin to explain? And the fact that Kylo was saying all these sweet things to him...

They talked some more, until Kylo had to go; apparently Hux, the drummer, was bothering him. Still, it left Poe frustrated, wanting more. Maybe that was how you summed it up; he wanted more of Kylo’s charisma, more of his touches, his words...

BB had left, thank God. Poe closed his door, before putting on a Knights of Ren song. One of the ones they’d had at the concert, about desire. He pictured Kylo actually saying those things to him as opposed to just typing them, and he felt practically tense with need as he took himself in hand under his underwear, stroked. The song didn’t help; God, but Kylo’s voice just did things to him...

When Poe came, Kylo’s name was on his lips. He was too tired by now to really consider what that might mean as he drifted into sleep. 


	5. A Vision In Orange

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which things change for Poe and Kylo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing. 
> 
> Author’s Notes: For MidgardianNerd, who’s still sick.

Jess and Paige went to see the concert with Poe and Finn this time. Even as Poe waited for Kylo to show up on stage, he definitely hoped that the fact he had come with Kylo’s name on his lips wasn’t blatantly obvious. Even inviting Jess and Paige to the concert had been awkward in that regard. Not to mention getting through the day.

Finally, the spotlights came on, and Hux tapped out a beat with his drum. Mitaka began strumming his guitar. Phasma began her bass-playing. And Kylo...fuck, but his voice could do things to Poe even as he began to sing about letting the past die. He shouldn’t feel that way. But fuck...

And Poe swore that occasionally, Kylo was looking particularly meaningfully at him. His voice, his eyes...Poe could swear that they were all but melting him. 

The songs seemed to blur together. All that really tied them together was Poe’s feeling of wanting Kylo, badly. 

They met Kylo backstage, Kylo seeming amused by Jess and Paige’s excitement and giving them free band merchandise. It was when they had to leave that Poe looked at Kylo. Kylo’s thumb brushed over his hand, and Poe wished, even as Finn gestured him away, that it could last longer.  

***

It was when Poe was lying in bed feeling particularly needy — and thankfully BB was asleep — that Kylo called him. Poe smiled. “You know, if you wanted to text me, you could text me,” he said. 

“Mmmmm,” Kylo said. “But then I wouldn’t have the satisfaction of hearing your pretty voice.”

Poe almost wanted to mention how much Kylo’s voice did things to him, but he didn’t know how much of that was appropriate to say to the rock star. "Well...thanks.”

”You even sound beautiful. I could get lost listening to you talk.” As Poe chuckled, Kylo said, “Even that. Even when you’re making fun of me.”

”I’m not making fun of you. I think it’s sweet.”

"Good,” Kylo said. “I couldn’t help but watch you during the show. You were very handsome in orange.” A beat. “Beautiful, actually.”

”Was I?”

”Yes.” A beat. “You haven’t lost that orange shirt, have you?”

”Still wearing it.”

”Good. I like imagining how you look in it.” Kylo’s voice...fuck, but Poe was already wanting him. This was going to cross a line there was no returning from, but...

”My pretty little space angel,” Kylo murmured. “I think you’re getting me used to orange. I might wear it one time.”

Poe laughed again. Then, “I’m not making fun of you. I...like the idea of you wearing orange. That’s all.” A beat. “I did like it when you called me an angel. Especially with that voice of yours.” His own voice was becoming tight and tense, and he prayed he didn’t let his arousal leak through. 

“You...like how I sound. It does things to you.”

A beat. 

“Don’t be embarrassed. I’ve heard it before. But you...it’s something coming from you.”

”Good.” Poe said. A thought struck him. “Where are Hux and the others?”

”Asleep,” Kylo said. “Why?”

”Wouldn’t want them eavesdropping.”

”Point.” Kylo sighed. “So...my voice does things to you. I do things to you.”

Silence. Poe wondered, absently, if he would be in trouble, but instead Kylo said, “Don’t be ashamed. I feel the same way for you.”

It was a relief. More than a relief. It was almost like every bit of tension Poe was holding faded for the moment. Kylo continued. “I fear you’ve already sucked me in with your charm. It’s difficult to resist you."

Fuck, but Poe didn’t want to either. 

“Your breathing’s shallow.” A pause. “Were you thinking about how my voice...did things to you?”

”Yes.” Poe’s voice was strained. He was already getting hard just from Kylo’s voice. 

“Do you want to act on those feelings?”

It was such a loaded question, but Poe said, “I do.” 

A pause. “I can’t reach you when we’re miles away, but we’ll make it work.” A beat. “I want you to show me how you want me to touch you. I want you to narrate it.” 

Fuck, but it was a good thing BB was out of the room. Poe couldn’t resist teasing. “I’m...touching my nipples.” A gasp even as they pebbled under his fingers. “Figured I’d...tease you a little. Make it good for you.”

”Go on. Go lower.”

Poe did. “I’m going past my belly,” he said, and he couldn’t keep the disdain out of his voice. 

“What’s wrong with your stomach?”

”It’s not flat. It’s a bit...pudgy.”

”You don’t need to be self-conscious,” Kylo said. “I like that you have a soft middle. It’s cute.” A beat. “Touch yourself.”

Poe took himself in hand and began to stroke. He bit his lip to stifle a gasp, only for Kylo to say, “I want to hear you. Don’t hold back.”

Poe moaned. He stroked and moaned even as Kylo coaxed him. Murmured about how he wished they were FaceTiming or Skyping so he could watch Poe’s expressions even as he jerked himself off to Kylo’s voice.

”That feel good?” Kylo said. "You like this?”

”Yes. Yes!” Fuck, but he was sensitive. Hard. 

“Move to your nipples again.” 

Poe moaned in frustration. "That’s...” It was both delicious and frustrating, not being able to keep working his shaft. 

“Are you okay?”

”I’m...intrigued,” Poe said, “Where you’re going with this.”

”I think your poor erogenous zones are being neglected.” 

“Right.” 

He massaged his nipples, allowing them to pebble again, and he moaned, desperately. 

“Sensitive,” Kylo murmured. “Needy. I bet you really want to come, don’t you, angel?”

The endearment only made Poe moan again. 

“My pretty space angel,” Kylo murmured with reverence. 

“I want to come,” Poe practically whimpered. “Please, Kylo.”

“I can’t refuse you. Touch yourself. Lower.”

Poe did. Followed Kylo’s commands until he was coming into his hand with Kylo’s name on his lips. 

Poe lay back, exhausted, panting. There was stickiness on his hand, and he was sweaty, but  he nonetheless stretched in satisfaction. His whole body...he wondered if they had crossed a line there was no returning from, but nonetheless, he was stupidly content. 

“How do you feel?” Kylo said, sounding this time a bit worried. “I didn’t cross a line, did I?”

”No. That felt good.” Poe sighed. “Let me...make you feel good too.”

”Fuck, but you’re too good to me,” Kylo said. He sighed. “Even imagining you after your orgasm’s making me hard. Makes you wonder what it’s like making love to you.” A groan. “I’ll do anything you ask if you’ll have me.”

”Touch yourself,” Poe said, and he heard a groan of relief suggesting Kylo did. He guided Kylo, guided his masturbation until, finally, Kylo murmured, “I’m so close...”

”Then come,” Poe said. He heard a shuddering groan that suggested Kylo had. Finally, it stopped, and Poe said, “How are you feeling?”

”Fucking spoiled rotten.” A laugh from Kylo. Then, "I love you, Poe. I think I’ve fallen in love with you.”

”Yeah,” Poe said. “I think I’ve fallen for you too.” 


	6. Inside Him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe loses his virginity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

It was the next morning, after a vivid dream involving Kylo thrusting into him that Poe woke, wondering what exactly he had done last night. 

_Well, you let a rock star talk you through masturbating, and then you did the same. Achievement Unlocked: What The Hell Was That?_

And the thing was that Poe wanted more. Even as he headed to the shower and got in, he couldn’t help but think of how good it all felt. How beautiful Kylo sounded...

The shower was cold, but Poe felt hot. Felt like he was growing harder. It was after he got out of the shower that he checked his texts. 

Kylo.  _Did you sleep well?_

How did he put that? Eventually, Poe typed,  _Wasn’t easy considering I dreamed of you inside me._

Silence. Then,  _I dreamed of you too. I don’t know who I like better — dream you or real you._

Poe swallowed. Even imagining what effect he had on Kylo was amazing.

_Is Hux up?_

_Asleep. Touch yourself, Poe._

Poe did. The phone rang, and Poe answered it, only to be greeted by Kylo’s voice. “Tell me what you’re thinking about.”

”You, of course.” Poe tried to say lightly — which was slightly ruined by the fact that he was gasping, panting. 

“Pretty space angel,” Kylo crooned. “I wish we could FaceTime so I could see your beautiful face.”

Poe’s heart sped up, and he moaned. Kylo continued. “Though your moans make up for it. Are you going to moan like that when I’m thrusting inside you?”

”I’d — ah, fuck — scream.” Poe moaned in desperation. 

“I can picture you. Hot, tight, just for me.” A beat. “Has anyone fucked you, Poe?”

”Never — got to that point.” Fuck, but what would it feel like being filled up like that? How big was Kylo? Judging by the rest of him, he’d fill Poe up a lot. 

“I find that hard to believe. Someone so beautiful, and no one gave you an orgasm.” Kylo’s voice was soft. “You know what I’d do if distance wasn’t a barrier, my love?”

”Tell me.”

”I'd let you ride me. See your pretty face as you rode my dick like you needed me.”

”Please...”

”Tonight?” Kylo said. “Tonight, angel?”

”Y-yeeessss.” Even as Poe spilled into his hand, he didn’t feel satisfied with just jerking off to Kylo’s voice. He needed more.

At least there was tonight. 

***

That night, after a light dinner where Poe swore that he couldn’t take his eyes off Kylo, they made love. It was like a scramble of hands and clothes and flesh, and Poe found his yellow shirt pulled off. Kylo pressed a tender kiss to his belly, and said, “It’s okay. It’s okay, you know. You are literally the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.”

Poe could feel more at ease in that regard. “So, what you suggested earlier...” 

”Ride me,” Kylo murmured. “I want to feel you on top of me. I want to be inside you.”

Poe’s breathing hitched. Then he did. Kylo handed him the bottle of lubricant and said, “You can coat your fingers in it, then fuck yourself on them. I want to make you loose enough to accommodate me.”

Judging by the sheer size of Kylo (it wasn’t like a porn star penis, but he was impressive), Poe couldn’t disagree. He inserted a finger, moaning at the sensation — though it wasn’t enough — of being filled up. Another finger joined it, and Poe moaned desperately as he fucked himself on his fingers. He practically screamed even as he hit something...pleasurable, throwing his head back. He looked back, seeing Kylo shudder and close his eyes in arousal, wet his lips. “Must have found your pleasure spot. Your prostate. You want this? My cock hitting that place with every thrust?”

”Y-yes.” It came out a sobbing breath. 

“Ride me, Poe,” Kylo practically growled. “I want to hear your voice screaming my name.”

Poe sank onto Kylo’s shaft, and fuck, but that was a big dick. It filled him — Poe was filled up almost completely as he impaled himself on that perfect, big cock. 

“Are you okay?” Kylo said, in between the gasps of being inside Poe. 

“It feels good. Fuck.”

”That’s what we’re doing, angel. Touch yourself. I want to see your face this time as you jerk yourself off.”

Poe moaned again, before doing so. He stroked, jerked frantically in time with riding Kylo, and his moans became joined with gasps and pants. His thighs trembled and clenched even as he approached orgasm. 

“I bet you really want to come,” Kylo murmured. “You’re so close. I can’t wait to hear you screaming.”

Poe came with a howl and a moan, and the clenching of his hole around Kylo’s dick must have set the rock star off because Kylo came, filling Poe with his seed until it just stopped. Poe drew off Kylo, feeling sore — but deliciously sore and satisfied. He collapsed on Kylo’s chest, Kylo petting his hair. 

“How do you feel?” Kylo said. “Did I satisfy you?”

”You did,” Poe said. He sighed happily. “You really did.”

They drifted off in that moment, and Poe, right here, right now, couldn’t help but feel safe with Kylo.


	7. Preemptive Introductions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is more smut, and Kylo prepares to introduce Poe to everyone else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The sunlight streamed in, illuminating the two men as they lay on the floor with their bodies all but entwined. Poe stirred, before realizing that they were both sticky. “I need a shower,” he said. “We both do.”

”Mmmm...” Kylo sounded satisfied, more than satisfied, even protective as he snuggled around Poe. “I’m not complaining about a shower. Separately or together?”

”Together.” Fuck, but Poe was looking forward to it. 

Luckily, BB was asleep even as Poe and Kylo headed to the shower. Kylo looked around in affectionate amusement. “Looks like even your shower is sci-fi themed.”

Poe shrugged. “What can I say? I love the genre.”

They got inside, and Kylo said, “There was something I wanted to try with you, Poe.”

”I’m intrigued.” After last night, Poe was up for anything. 

“How do you feel about if I...pleasured you? With my mouth?”

Judging by how Poe’s cock twitched, it wasn’t complaining. 

“You know...I’d love it.”

They turned on the shower water. Poe could feel the warmth of it hitting his body and then Kylo, after kneeling, placing kisses to Poe’s pelvic area and thighs, nibbling and sucking at his thighs and belly, and fuck, Poe hadn’t thought that the worship would feel so good, but here he was. 

“Kylo,” Poe moaned in frustration. 

“You want this, darling? You want me sucking you off?”

Poe groaned in frustration. “Please.”

The warmth of Kylo’s mouth around his shaft felt too good. Poe petted Kylo’s hair even as the younger man licked and sucked, and he took shivering, sobbing breaths. It was the sweetest agony, and he whimpered, “Kylo...”

Kylo drew off. “You all right?” Even rough from his ministrations, his voice was so beautiful. 

“I can feel it. I think I’m going to come.”

Kylo smiled. “I can swallow you. I can take it.”

”O-okay.” 

Kylo took him back into his mouth, before Poe arched against the shower wall. He hit his head on the wall, but fuck, that was nothing compared to how good he felt as he climaxed, practically sobbing Kylo’s name even as Kylo greedily swallowed him down. 

And then he was spent. Poe gingerly rubbed his head. “Jesus...” 

“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you got off on a bit of pain,” Kylo said lightly. 

Now that he thought about it...

"Maybe a little.”

Kylo smiled. “I’m not complaining, angel. Not in the slightest. Anything I get to know about you is wonderful.”

Poe couldn’t help but laugh. “Sap,” he teased. 

“I prefer ‘damnably in love with you’.”

Later, Poe managed to bring Kylo to climax (with Kylo’s agreement) using his mouth. He would say he did relatively okay, even with his jaw aching and wondering if he was doing a good job. Kylo pulled him up after, smiled. 

“You did well,” he said. “Really well, Poe.”

Poe couldn’t help but wear orange when he dressed later, and even seeing Kylo’s appreciative eyes on him, he could tell that he had made the right decision. 

***

”You did what with whom?”

Jess sounded astounded. Poe sighed. “If you could get any louder, Jess, I think that people outside the building could hear you.”

”Sorry. I’m just...so proud of you. Our little baby, out dating and stuff...”

Poe smiled. He didn’t know if the heat he felt thinking about Kylo showed up on his skin, but God. 

Jess continued. “Does he treat you well?”

”Incredibly.” Poe couldn’t help but think of Kylo inside him last night, or his lips around his cock this morning, and he was glad Jess couldn’t read minds. 

“What’s he like?”

”Charming, witty, loving, caring, kind, creative. He’s wonderful.” A beat. “His name’s Jason.”

”We’re going to have to meet him sometime.”

”Yeah.” Poe smiled as he spoke. “You might.”

***

It was after school that Poe was working on his novel when Kylo texted him, asking him if he was interested in being properly introduced to the rest of the band, as well as Kylo’s family. 

 _I’m interested,_ Poe texted. 

_Good. I prefer you not being like that poor bastard from The Shining typing the same sentence over and over. 😉_

Poe couldn’t help but laugh.  _You should read the original novel. It’s got a lot of character development._

_I believe you. Maybe you can tell me more after I pick you up._

Poe knew he looked forward to it. 


End file.
